Archive for the ‘Life’ Category

Start before it is too late…

September 25, 2012 Leave a comment

The longer I am in the financial industry, the more I see my peers and my own clients their health start to show signs of aging. chronic illness started to creep into their lives.

Today, I met up with a couple who are younger than me one already went through a heart bypass and the other had cancer. They had all these before they are 30. My heart aches to know that at such young age they are experiencing illness which normally hit those who are in their late 50s and 60s. The age get younger these days. I will be helping them to seek  if there is any chance the insurance companies will accept them with some exclusion. My heart was tremendously heavy for them as I know the cost of medical treatment in Singapore is costly unless you do not mind going to a lower class ward where alot of pple are fighting to be on the waiting list to be treated.

Even before I reached home just now I received an email from an insurance company who had outright rejected my client application. As I read the reason for rejection, I felt so saddened because she only discovered it one month before meeting me. If she had met me 3 months ago instead of delaying the appointment I would have gotten her into medical insurance. She is only 45.

After seeing so many of these similar cases, I am convinced that my mission is to help as many pple possible to get them into a medical plan so that they will not be deprived from high quality medical treatment if they need them in the future.

Those many may reject my kind offer to help review their existing medical plans. I know my mission is not to force them but to educate them to do something about it.

It is always good to start a proper medical plan while you are still young & health than start when it is too late. Even though you have the money but you don’t have the health be underwritten anymore.

Categories: Life, Reflection

3rd quarter of 2012

September 21, 2012 Leave a comment

2012 is left with slightly more than 3 mths. Have I achieved anything some yes some no.

The last 9 mths flew past me like a raise of an eyebrow.

On a personal level my health had improved building more muscles but my weight din went down it is still the same. My diet had changed quite a fair bit I ha already started to eat less processed food. More soupy stuff. Half my portion of cabs.

Financially, I had emptied my account once again for Reno, furnitures, appliances etc. need to restart my savings and work harder to earn more to cope with the extra expenses.

There are many things I would put in place for next year… Going try out new stuff & live my life even more to the max.


Categories: Life, Me, Reflection

I understood pain and hurt (1)

September 21, 2012 Leave a comment



I like the quotes that was written above… it is who I am today.

I had the privilege to listen to a dear friend out pour of the pain and hurt that had gone passed… The person asked me one question how come you can overlooked all the pain and hurt and laughed it off… I answered coz it is not worth dwelling upon it. There were many pains and hurts I had gone thru to be able to laugh it off and move on.

I decided to pin this down before I grow old and forgot all about them.

At a very young age, I understood pain and hurt from my own mother. Being uneducated and the youngest daughter, she didn’t have the means to read and know how to be a good mother. There is no one to guide her or teach her to nurture her own children. To add the matter worse she was the youngest in the family. She was doted and like a little princess she didn’t have to go through hardship  to obtain the things that she wanted. Everything was easily given to her, all she needed to do was asked.

Thus when she was match made to be married to my dad, she expected a comfortable life and didn’t need to worry about money. Dad made sure he was about to provide for the family… he worked extremely hard to make sure that she had a comfortable life and she did. Until I came into the picture.

Dad had to work even harder to provide for the future expenses. Save as much as he could, spend as little as he could to prepare for my arrival.

I didn’t  gave my mom a easy pregnancy, I was a difficult baby she had quite a bad 1st trimester could eat much. Dad had to travel distant and I mean distant cos Singapore wasn’t really developed then to get her the cravings that she had. Dad did all these to help ease her pregnancy.

When the day I was supposed to be born it was discovered that my head was in wrong position thus gyna had no choice but to do a C-section. She had a really had a difficult road of recovery. She felt helpless and clueless on how to take care of infant. Dad decided to engage a confinement lady to help her. I remember dad telling me that he had to rush home during his lunch hours to see if I was well taken care of.

Fast forward to few years later when I was slightly older maybe 3-4 years old. I always love toys, those tiny army soldiers, cars, tanks etc. I always wanted to get more coz they were so interesting and they came in different countries. I wanted them coz they are my only companions, I was the only child then I didn’t have a younger siblings that I could play with thus I would play by myself and entertain myself. I remembered every time I asked for a new toy I would without fail be beaten up quite badly in public. No explanation. No reason. Just straight away beaten up and dragged home… Till date the memory still hurts and pains me.

Dad would always surprised with those toys on the weekend… they were my prized processions.

I loved to display all my tiny soldiers and place them all over the living room in our 2rm rented flat in Toa Payoh. I would pretend that I was the chief commender and commended the troops to attack and destroy the enemies. Every time when I done playing with them I would love to sleep in the middle of all my tiny soldiers like they were my good friends to accompany me to sleep. Without fail I was either scolded or caned for not keeping my toys. No explanation no reason.

The beating continued so long as I am naughty or disobey or didn’t fall into the so called expectations of my mother. I hated the beatings. I grew more and more bitter against her I vowed one day I will be strong and defend myself against such beatings. As I grew older whatever I knew I was going to be beaten I would run straight away to snatch the cane before she could lay hands on it , I would hide and lock in my parent’s room for hours. She would coax me to come out and I initially thought I wouldn’t be beaten. I was wrong the beating continue. This go on for weeks and I knew there was no point of hiding since I would be beaten anyway. I figured that I should face the beating and whether it happens I would snatch the cane and break it and threw them away. It worked for awhile before she bought even more canes in case I decided to do that she would have backups.

In the end she gave up and decided to grab anything that she could lay her hands on brushes, brooms, small stools… I was physically abused by my own mother. There was this incident that the broom was broken after a few times of beatings. Wow my skin had became tougher… hahahaha.

Dad was always busy working hard that didn’t really know why I always got bruises and cane marked. He only knew I was naughty that why I was beaten up so badly. He trusted my mom.

The beating lessen after my sister was born. She was too busy taking care of her to be bothered with me.

Till this day it hurts really bad to recall those memories, even though I had tried to forgive her of her shortcomings. It stings very deeply in my heart.

I ever wonder why I was born to be abused by my mother… wouldn’t it be better if I wasn’t born in this world… If not for my dad’s love I would probably ran off somewhere and live by my own.

I always envy my friends’ moms that they took so good care of them. Had home cooked food. Had love showered upon them. I don’t remember have a decent cooked food. Most of the time, canned food or the same old food repeated again and again.

What a childhood… it made me stronger.

Thank you for being my mother still… I wasn’t a easy child to be taken care of anyway. You had a difficult time trying to bring me up as your 1st one.

Categories: Dad, Life, Reflection, Uncategorized

2011 at a glance

January 3, 2012 Leave a comment

Looking back into 2011, there were alot of ups and downs… happiness, sadness, joy, disappointments. Nevertheless, it was a good year.

In January, I was away with my wife for our 1st anniversary in Vietnam. We had lotsa of fun there, enjoyed french cuisines at a fraction of the price we would have to pay in Europe. Have cheap local food and fell in love with the weather in Dalat. Had my 1st experience of being pick pocketed which left us with little to spend for the rest of the trip in Ho Chi Ming City. I’m still thankful that God protected us from harm.

In February, we couldn’t give ang baos cos it was advisable since Dad is not gone for 1 year so we couldn’t really celebration CNY. This was the 1st year, Dad wasn’t around anymore to cook for the whole Tan clan. I deeply missed him, his dishes, his presence in the kitchen. At the same time, discovered that my 2nd uncle’s health was falling.

In March, it was both joyful & sorrowful month, Jac’s shop was officially open on 12th Mar 2011. It was a tremendously happy occasion as she finally have a shop of her own to welcome her clients and work in. It was a milestone for her. On 24th Mar 2011 my closest 2nd uncle passed away from liver failure due to late stage cancer. It brought me down because he is my closest uncle & one of Dad’s closer brothers. When he was around he was one uncle that in his quiet manner shown his love to me. Doted me when I was young whenever I stayed at his place to play with my cousin. A man who had no temper and quiet… I will miss him deeply as I miss my own Dad.

In April, I was in hospital for health check up and was cleared with a clean bill of health cos I wanted to make sure I am still fit for my 21km run.

In May, went to Genting with some of my colleagues and had a wonderful time of fun and bonding. Did my 21km run after a good 10 years of not running for such long distance. Dad was gone for 1 year but I still can feel his presence & miss the late night tea session with him. I miss sharing my achievements & problems with him. I miss his wise insight on the situation.

In Jun, visited a colleague for her baby’s 1st mth and return to be in my greens which I dreaded because I got so much unfinished work to be done.

In July, I was still in my reservist till the middle of the month, it was the longest reservist 4 long weeks… I was sponsored to be on 2 courses which benefitted me much for my work and growth.

In August, was blessed with one of the industry veterans who personally mentored me. He trained and moved me into a new level of doing my work with even more pride and integrity. It was as though God gave me another fatherly figure whom I could looked up to.

In September, there were few incidents that I was contacted via FB to help to provide financial planning to help the various families who wanted unbiased advises for the families well being.

In October, went overseas twice. It was a break for my wife for her to reflect and recharge. God was good to us, Thailand was experiencing flood but we were not affected in any way. It was only when we came back then we realized the seriousness of the flooding in Thailand. Went to Penang with 2 brothers and befriended a few new friends there. They took the step of faith by starting up their own church with little funding and witnessed God’s miracles. The congregation grew through sports.

In November, hosted the family from Penang and was blessed by the family’s prayers. Had a simple celebration for my 34th birthday . Discovered that I was betrayed by a friend after knowing him for so many years. I totally lost my respect and trust for the person. It took me quite awhile to regain myself and stand up again to move on.

In December, I completed my 1st ever 42km marathon I finally achieved my personal goal of running a full marathon before I turn 35. Organized a successful Christmas lunch for my colleagues and everyone enjoyed and had fun. Wrote on the floating balls for NYE countdown our wishes for 2012. Celebrated NYE hunting the open display of elephants and watched one of the spectacular fireworks which lasts for a good 9-10mins.

Categories: Life, Reflection

Looking back at my 2011 resolutions

December 27, 2011 Leave a comment

It is the end of the year where I am taking a slow down to reflect on the things that I set myself to do… I am glad that I had achieved some where there are rooms of improvement for some.


  1. Read at least 10 books about Management – (Manage to read 2)
  2. Journal & Reflect my thoughts per week – (Pen down almost bi weekly)
  3. Be thankful for things whether good or bad – (Most of the time)
  4. Go for at least 1 mountain climb trip – (Nope, suppose to go but pull out last min coz of bad timing)
  5. Sponsor 1 more kid at the end of the yr – (Sponsored 3!!!)


  1. Spend 30mins every morning on devotion – (Some days my morning was on a rush, so I did it at night. By and large quite ok)
  2. Pray before I sleep using ACTS – (Prayed but hardly do using ACTS)
  3. Complete reading the bible using ESV – (Failed)
  4. Keep a record of prayed answered by God – (Here and there recorded them)
  5. Share the gospel to 5 individuals – (Done 2)


  1. Run thrice a week, 5km – (2 times in the last quarter)
  2. Train for my 21km, 42km run – (Didn’t really train hard for it but manage to complete both 21km & 42km)
  3. Eat in moderation – (I still love hunting for yummy food) (Started doing that the last quarter coz of 42km)
  4. Reduce my weight to 75kg (85kg now!?!?!) – (Down to 82kg, got way more, More, MORE  room for improvement)
  5. Sleep before 12am – (Failed miserably)


  1. Serve 50 more families – (Served 20 families)
  2. Obtain another professional qualifications – (AFP, CFP, etc) – (Not yet)
  3. Have 5 COF – (Have 1)
  4. Write Will for 25 individuals – (Written 5, quite a no pending)
  5. Help newer advisers to achieve their targets – (Encouraged a few)
Categories: Life, Reflection

Looking back at 2010…

December 31, 2010 2 comments

Looking back at 2010, there alot of Ups and Downs… it had been an extremely eventful year for me. I thanked God for seeing me thru all the Downs… giving me all the Ups to encourage me thru those difficult times.

On 30th Jan, I finally married to a talented, comical, creative, beautiful, etc gf, Jac. She has bring me alot joyful times, sometimes upsetting moments. Nevertheless, I am thankful that we had tied our knots. Many of our friends, relatives witnessed our wedding vows happened in a church context. Dad was smiling the brightest that day 🙂

On 8th Feb – 24th Feb, we went for our honeymoon after our 2nd wedding dinner. We were in Hokkaido for the 1st time… I saw snow falling from the sky for the very 1st time. Celebrated our 1st valentine’s time & CNY in Otaru, a romantic town filled with old warehouses along a beautiful canal in Hokkaido. We skied for the 1st time in the snow. Saw iceberg in Abashiri, the northeast coast of Hokkaido.

On 21st Mar, Jac & I stayed in Ritz Carlton coz we got this 1 night free stay thru a talk… the experience was wonderful. Overseeing the beautiful skyline of the biz district… We had a great time off work and shared our inspirations.

On 23rd – 28th Apr, I went to China for the 1st time… it was an eye opener for me… China was more advance then I tot it was… the only thing was most of the devices are in chinese which take a while to get used to. Food was cheap and nice… Had my massage done traditional chinese way… it was extremely painful as compared to those in Thailand but extremely  gd coz I felt my stressed muscles due to the work in S’pore loosen… my blood circulation was better. I dun mind going back for another painful torture… hahaha

31st May was the darkest day of my life. my closest friend, most talented man, best dad left us after battling in the hospital for more than 1mth. It broke my heart the most seeing my dad leaving us before we could create more wonderful memories together… there were some many things that I wanted to learn from him… his cooking skill, wisdom in handling things and so much more… Till today, I still think he is ard though he is no longer there… but I know he is already in a good place in heaven. God has already taken him in His arms… I look forward in meeting him one day in heaven.

In mid Jun, we started our kick boxing session… It was interesting yet embarrassing moment for me coz I was the only man in the entire class… O.o After 9wks, the other sessions we wanted didn’t fit our busy schedule… we hope to join KB again next yr.

On 29th – 30th Jul, I attended my 1st AFA congress. I learnt alot of stuff from the industry veterans… my mindset changed… I was motivated by all the speakers and trainers. In order for me to fly, I need to mingle with the eagles… I was encouraged that beside working hard and earning money… they serve the less fortunate either by giving or going to these countries to build homes, educate and train the poor for life skill that enable to earn money for themselves.

On 7th – 10th Aug, the AG went overseas together for our 1st time… we were at Melaka… ate alot of gd penarakan food, chicken rice ball, dim sum… It was challenging to have little children and adults driving up… the trip was filled with fun and laughters… the children din want to go back on the last day… some of the adults dun want to face the reality of work… hahaha.

5th Sep, I ran in support of the Yellow Ribbon Run… 10km after 10yrs of not running for such distance… I was an enjoyable run… accompanied with my sister and brother in law… Oh I ran in the rain for the 1st time. 😛

On 17th Oct, I ran for 15km with an army fren… I was rather painful run for me as I wasn’t really fully prepared… I was walking when I hit the beach area… Nevertheless, I completed the run… and is determine to go for one next yr 2011 to improve my timing.

20th Oct – 2nd Nov, I was having my reservist… one of those reservist that I found myself having the least sleep… coz of timing of duties… I felt my life got wasted inside the camp… thankfully, the OC was awesome… we got to go home early on certain days… I got to know an army fren better during the reservist than I was when I was during my active NS days.

On 9th – 15th Nov, we went overseas as a family (namely Jac, my sister, BIL & mom) to Taiwan, Taipei… It was my 1st time overseas with my family… my mom took the plane for the 1st time… the entire trip was an experience… I overcome my fear of eating smelly beancurd… and I overcome it… Wahaha… I will only eat those which are nice… coz the taste wasn’t as stinky as I tot… while those that are lousy are smelly and tasteless. Yucks!!! Drank alot of milk stuff there… my fav is the papaya milk… the one u found in Amoy street has the standard… 🙂 Went to hot spring for the 1st time. We witness the giant flower expo… 4 huge parks having the exhibition, we only managed to cover 3 parks… 😦 Had a best steamboat buffet … the food was neatly placed and the selection was awesome… I dun mind going back to Taiwan again… this time rd with Jac coz it is easier to travel with just two person. Oh yeah… i celebrated my nephew’s bday on 7th Nov with him for the 1st time 🙂

4th – 9th Dec, we were involved with Navcamp… one of the most enjoyable camp as a laborer… though I was sick and could run my 21km standchart run… Next yr I will conquer the 42km run. Coming back to navcamp… I had a wonderful time involving myself in food dept… I guess maybe cos this will be my last time involving in navcamp as I wanted to take a break to concentrate in my work and explore my involvement in church next yr.

15th Dec, Love Droplets finally have a shop of its own… Woohoo… how cool is that… I will post an entry of the journey another time as its reno is not complete yet.

This kind of sums up my journey in 2010… this yr I ran in and out of hospital the most… mainly coz of my dad… the later half of the yr… quite a no of my frens were in hospital as well… it was a difficult time to see pple whom are closed to you sick… Everytime when I am there… I will be praying for them and asking God to keep them healthy and give them speedy recovery.

I had many 1st time in 2010… God is really gd to me… I look forward to 2011 with much excitement… and I pray that I will continue to see his sovereign hands in my journey with Him…

Happy 2011 New Year to all!!! God bless!!!

Categories: Life, Reflection

Liu Wei – Armless Pianist, Do it anyway – Mother Teresa

August 23, 2010 1 comment

I saw this clip over the fb update of some of my friends… I admired his courage to live on his life instead of giving it up. At the tender age of 10, he lost his arms through an accident…

At first he was at a lost, how he is able to eat without his hands… his mom told him, he had to learn to eat on his own coz when they are gone there will be no one there to help him. Hence through his adversity he overcome his own inability. He used his legs instead.

Later on, he picked up piano when he was 19 due to his interest… after that enter the show to show the world that he can still play the piano without his hands.

I like what he mentioned… he got two choices either to die due to his misfortunate or live his life to the fullest. He chose the latter. I felt encouraged as well as touched by his determination and courage.

One of the judges said that he didn’t complain or allow about his circumstances to stop him from living life. I agreed with the judge fully.

I looked at my own life and have to be honest, sometimes I do complain about things from time to time… I need to remind myself and others that complain get us nowhere… instead it brings us bitterness, anger, discontentment, etc…

Instead of complaining of life, I ought to see life in a different light… I have a complete functional body, a roof over my head, enough money to spend, a job, a loving family, etc. I need to appreciate life as it is…

I need to take charged of my life… if things can take action I will do it… not blaming others for my adversity, hate myself for its circumstances, etc.

I love Mother Teresa’s quote.

People are often unreasonable, irrational, and self-centered. Forgive them anyway.

If you are kind, people may accuse you of selfish, ulterior motives.  Be kind anyway.

If you are successful, you will win some unfaithful friends and some genuine enemies. Succeed anyway.

If you are honest and sincere people may deceive you.  Be honest and sincere anyway.

What you spend years creating, others could destroy overnight.  Create anyway.

If you find serenity and happiness, some may be jealous.  Be happy anyway.

The good you do today, will often be forgotten.  Do good anyway.

Give the best you have, and it will never be enough.  Give your best anyway.

In the final analysis, it is between you and God.  It was never between you and them anyway.

-this version is credited to Mother Teresa

Categories: Life, Reflection, youtube